Tuesday, September 25, 2018

The Gospel According to Bus 104


For the last couple of years of my supposed retirement I have taught ethics as an adjunct at the local state (née community) college. Truth be told, my business with teaching simply was not finished in 2015 even as I had felt the need to escape the university with my sanity and what was left of my dignity. I had come to the university from the Osceola Campus of Valencia in 2001. At a very basic level, it was like coming home to return to teaching there. 



Transit Trade-offs

After my first few weeks as an adjunct commuting to work, I calculated that between my planning time, grading time and commute time - in addition to my actual time on campus -  I was making just above minimum wage. Between tolls and mileage to the Osceola Campus alone, I was paying nearly $17 each way just to get there. 

So I began riding the local transit system bus to work. It was a long ride, about an hour and 10 minutes on a good day, one way, this after a 15 minute drive to the bus stop along the route to the college, catching the bus in front of a grocery store where I left my car each morning.

It was a hassle on a good day. The bus was as often late as not. Because it only ran every hour, I always gave myself plenty of leave time prior to scheduled departure. That meant I waited most mornings 10-15 minutes. But it also gave me some breathing room when the bus ran late so I wasn’t late to my class. Some days it rained and at my stop – like most stops - there was not even a bench to sit on, much less a shelter.

So, who really cares about working class people, anyway, right?

But the bus ride allowed me time on the way down to the college to catch up on the news, to check to see if it would be raining when it came time to catch the bus home that afternoon or to read the latest dystopian science fiction novel on my Kindle. I used the time on the way home each evening to grade papers.

The second year of my commute, the bus became free for college students and staff. I could hardly get a better deal. No one was going to pay me to ride.

While the use of local transit came at a cost of time and convenience, it had other payoffs which are hard to reduce to the dollars and cents that market fundamentalism insists that all aspects of life in a consumerist culture be measured in. My car was not adding one more vehicle to overcrowded local highways. It was not adding one more car’s worth of demands for carbon fuels or dumping one more car’s worth of carbon exhaust into our atmosphere.  

There was much less wear and tear on my aging Prius, a car this retiree hopes will last me indefinitely. I didn’t have to worry about traffic along the way – much of which is under construction - or parking once I arrived. Thus, I inevitably arrived a lot less stressed than before.

Then there were the educational aspects.

Some days I simply sat on the bus and watched the parade of humanity that passed by my seat. It was never dull. Living in a majority/minority metropolitan area, the first thing one learns is that they can never presume the person sitting next to them speaks English as their first language. Then there was the lesson I learned as a professional middle class man, that my life circumstances were rarely shared by the majority of the people I encountered.

I called it the Margaret Mead Express. Because whatever else you might say about that long ride, it was never dull. And it was always informative. 

Aware of My Privilege

The morning She appeared I found myself just sitting, looking around the crowd. The bus was about half full and, as is often the case at that late morning hour, fairly quiet. I noted that, as usual, many riders wore the required polyester corporate uniforms enroute to or from work.

It was one of many moments that I was consciously aware of my own privilege.

Perhaps it was the fact I had the luxury of spending my transit time checking for last minute student messages on my course site using my iPad which in turn had access to the bus’ wifi system. Or maybe it was the fact I had a thermos of coffee I’d made at home with my favorite Cuban coffee beans and soy milk from which I periodically took a clandestine swig (you’re not supposed to eat or drink on the bus, for good reasons).

Then there was the fact my polo bore no corporate logo declaring that the garment – if not the very soul of its bearer – were ultimately the property of some  corporate chain restaurant, hotel or managed health care system.

Like many who sat around me, I, too, would be paid no benefits nor a living wage by an employer who relied on part-time, minimally paid workers to continue operating. But, unlike any of them, I had a meager state pension paying me enough to keep the lights on and the beans on the table. And I had a husband whose medical coverage through the same college toward which I was headed to work which ensured treatment should I become injured or ill.  Adjunct teaching for me was at some level a luxury I could engage or not as I chose.

Few people on the bus that morning could make any of those claims.

Because I had nothing pressing that morning, I was able to stare out the windows at scenes of life passing outside my window. These were working class neighborhoods with exotic sounding names: Sky Lake, Meadow Wood Estates, Buenaventura Lakes. I would never live in neighborhoods like those, I simply passed through them twice daily enroute to and from my job as a college professor and wondered to myself what life was like in such a place.

(Brief Excursus: I love community/state colleges. Every teacher is called “professor” there out of respect - including adjuncts like myself. Neither the students nor the staff have the time or the need to play the inflated ego games of hierarchy or status that is second nature at universities. If you’re standing in front of the class, your title is professor.)

She Looked Exhausted

This day promised to be challenging at the college. It was the day we covered the ethics of punishment. Who punishes whom and why was one topic that always managed to engage students, some of whom would have already experienced the “justice system” first hand. I sat pondering how I would try to explain concepts like deterrence theory and its many failings and restorative justice and its largely unrealized promise.

That was the moment She came staggering down the aisle. And at that moment, the world seemed to grind to a complete halt.



She was a middle aged African-American woman. Overweight. Graying hair flowing loose, unkempt. She looked exhausted, her eyes opened just enough to negotiate her way down the aisle and up the stairs to the back of the bus. Indeed, her appearance suggested that today was not an exception for her, she had probably led a difficult life.

In another life she might have been a pillar of her community, a respected source of wisdom at her local church and a valued voice in its choir, famous for her chicken and dumplings at the Sunday potluck. This day she wore the flimsiest of worn rubber thong sandals on her dirty feet. Her dress was so sheer as to be diaphanous, more like ragged bed clothing than daily public wear. Periodically her garments gaped open revealing large swollen breasts which threatened to spill out unimpeded.

As she passed without making eye contact with any of us that morning, I almost lost my breath. This was not the ordinary denizen of Bus 104. She fell into her seat at the very rear of the bus with a loud sigh, dropping into a semi-coma almost immediately.

As I looked around me, for at least a brief moment, everyone there seemed to recognize that something unusual had just happened. Then, just as quickly, they went back to their previous activities.

Perhaps some of them wondered about her as I did. What had brought this woman to this place this day in this condition? Had she had a long night? Was she running from abuse? Had she just scored whatever cheap street drug that was available to temporarily escape the hell that was her life? Was she mentally well? How in the world did she end up here, looking like this?

Heaven only knew. And this morning, heaven wasn’t about to tell.

Just Trying to Get By

But she didn’t care. Soon loudly snoring, she was oblivious to the fact she was nearly exposed here amidst a group of strangers. Fortunately for her, few of them paid much attention.

Indeed, a number of them, too, were dead tired. Some were coming off night shifts at hotels, restaurants, hospitals, their bodies and dirty clothing smelling of a long hard day of labor, perhaps at more than one job site connected by even more bus rides.

Some listened to i-pods or distracted themselves with games on their cells. Some surreptitiously gobbled down cold remnants of their daily fast food meal, looking around to see if anyone noticed they were breaking the rules regarding food and beverages on the bus. Truth be told, no one really cared.

Others took clandestine swigs from cans of malt liquor poorly disguised by the tan paper bags issued them with the beer at the convenience store. For most of us, this would be the middle of an ordinary work day, hardly the time to be swilling down booze. But for these folks it was the end of their shifts and they were determined to take the edge off their bodily – if not existential - pain at the end of a long day.

It was a bus full of souls just trying to get by.

Not everyone was exhausted. Some wearing freshly washed clothes and plastic name tags simply sat quietly awaiting their stops at the Walmart, restaurants and convenience stores where they would spend their day. Some elderly men with oversized fountain drinks from corner filling stations carried on animated discussions in Spanish with people they knew sitting several rows of seats away. Here and there students used the time on the bus to get in last minute cramming before the algebra and biology tests they faced upon arrival at the same destination I awaited.

Then there was the occasional professional middle class worker like myself, a professor reading the last minute excuses from students who would be avoiding that day’s classes. My guess is that most of my fellow passengers figured I was there due to a DUI and suspension of my driving privileges. Neither was true but I didn’t really care.

And neither did She.

In the back of the bus where I always sat, the snoring had tapered off to a low hum. For a moment, she was at peace.

And Yet the Image Shines Through

Years ago, Joan Osborne made a hit record raising a provocative question:

Just a slob like one of us.
Just a stranger on the bus trying to make his way home….”

(Joan Osborne, 1995)

What indeed.



As I observed this exhausted woman, her large breasts spilling out of her sheer garment and heaving with each breath, collapsed now across two seats, head against the rear window, calloused feet dangling into the aisle, a sudden revelation came to me:

“Here is the image of G-d.”

Undignified.

Impoverished.

Socially unacceptable.

But nonetheless the divine image, shining brightly through what Mother Theresa called “the distressing disguise of poverty,” for those willing to look long enough to see it.  Here was one of the “little ones” that Jesus loved, one of the poor that Jesus said G-d sees as blessed.

And for just that brief moment, I realized what an incredible privilege I had been afforded to be present for that revelation.

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Harry Scott Coverston
Orlando, Florida



If the unexamined life is not worth living, surely an unexamined belief system, be it religious or political, is not worth holding. Most things worth considering do not come in sound bites.

For what does G-d require of you but to do justice, and to love kindness, and to walk humbly with your G-d? (Micah 6:8, Hebrew Scriptures)

Do not be daunted by the enormity of the world's grief. Do justly, now. Love mercy, now. Walk humbly now. You are not obligated to complete the work, but neither are you free to abandon it. - Rabbi Rami Shapiro, Wisdom of the Jewish Sages (1993)

 © Harry Coverston 2018
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6 comments:

Omniryx said...

I'm sorry that you consider the academic rank system to represent "inflated ego games of hierarchy or status that is second nature at universities." With 30+ years of university teaching experience at three major Carnegie One schools and several lesser institutions, I've certainly had my share of encounters with arrogant senior faculty jealous of their academic rank. But however swollen some heads might become in the process, gaining those those ranks is anything but a game. They represent not only teaching, advising, and grading papers but also endless hours of research, writing, presenting, publishing, scrambling for extramural funding, and repetitive-and-boring-but-necessary committee and governance work.

It is entirely possible to separate the months and years of hard work to gain rank from the bad behavior of the relatively few academics who become patronizing snobs in consequence of their attainments. The former is admirable, the latter deplorable. To conflate the two and dismiss them as mere "games" is inaccurate, inappropriate, and unfair.

I have great respect for your decades of excellent teaching and student advocacy. I appreciate, also, that you and other adjunct faculty have been treated very badly by administrators and sometimes by colleagues. Nonetheless, it troubles me to read your offhand dismissal of the many years of arduous toil spent to earn the title of "professor." If your students choose to accord you and others that courtesy title, by all means enjoy it and the compliment it represents. Please keep in mind, however, that in a great many institutions around the world, faculty have expended,blood, sweat, and tears to earn that rank.

frharry said...

Thanks for your comments.

It is certainly possible to distinguish hard work from bad behavior. It is also possible to distinguish that hard work from both the system in which it occurs as well as the impact that system has on interpersonal relationships within the academy.

Hard work and the valuable scholarship that is produced by it are worthy of praise and should be encouraged. Sadly, in many colleges, the zero sum hypercompetitiveness of the organizational cultures can prevent such accomplishments from being recognized and appreciated. It also animates hiring, promotion and tenure processes that can be highly arbitrary if not positively toxic in my observations at two large public universities.
But the point of my comment was less about the university with all of its virtues and warts than to note that for working class folks, the distinctions of rank make little difference to them. They don’t have time to worry about all that. They’re busy trying to make the best of lives which come with a lot more challenges than we professional middle class people are even aware of. That was the point of the essay generally.

- hsc

Fr.Anthony Borka said...

It costs 17 dollars for that journey? Your blog brought memories of my bus journeys in grammar and high school many years ago.None as interesting as yours. Your journey reminds us that God,who is Love,is all around us and in us and we need to treat each other with dignity and love.

Fr.Anthony Borka said...

Trying again as this did not work before.Enjoyed your post and it reminds us that God,who is Love,is in us and we need to treat each other with understanding and Love.

Unknown said...

I taught as an adjunct professor at Vassar College for ten years (1974-1984) and have no idea what the situation is there today, but during those ten years I was never called "professor" even once, because the custom then was that every faculty member, whatever their rank, was called "Mr" or "Ms" (perhaps "Miss" or "Mrs"). I spent ten years as "Mr. Kater". And Harry, you will remember that at CDSP all faculty members, in true California style, were called by their first name. I found both a refreshing contrast to my own experience as an undergraduate and even graduate student.

Abuna Lar said...

Dear Harry,

Reading your reflections just now I was reminded of the last chapter in a small, but inspiring, book of reflections, "Fragments of Hope: My Life as a Holy Cross Priest" (Corby Books, 2011), written by my friend Fr. Richard Berg, CSC. Dick serves as Chaplain at Mary's Woods, a retirement center in Lake Oswego, Oregon. Each day that he works (he is semi-retired from a storied career as a Professor of Psychology, Pastor of an inner-city parish and Founder of the McDonald Center, a low-income residence in what we used to call Old Town in inner-Northwest Portland), Dick rides the bus from his home on the University of Portland campus in north Portland to Mary's Woods. It's about a 90-minute ride, but Dick doesn't have to change buses, a real plus during our often-rainy NW Oregon winters. Of course, it also affords him the opportunity for interaction with his companions on the journey. Here's a reflection close to the end of the chapter titled "Hope in Motion:" "Buses are like the hope that carries us along, serves us, provides rest in the process, allows for reading, prayer, contemplating the future. And often on the journey, people share with one another the gift of hope by thoughtful greetings, conversation, and helpfulness.

"The cross of Christ is everywhere in the world; and so is the hope it brings" (page 130).

Thanks for your own reflections today, which inspired me to send you this note.

Blessings to you and yours. . . .
Larry